I choose not to require validation of existence.
The other day one of my mates on Facebook made a beautiful post declaring a number of choices he had made for his life. It was a familiar sort of list, a declaration of all the intentions he wants to carry out in life, but specifically phrased as active choices instead of a more passive list of ideas.
Excerpt from Jesse’s Choices
I choose to continue training and learning, my craft and life lessons
I choose to hold myself responsible for my choices and to inspire.
I choose to accept help in what ever form it comes
I choose love
I found this terribly inspiring, and immediately thought to myself “I want to make choices too!”
My second immediate thought was “That’s silly, I’m already making choices, all the time.”
Last week I find myself writing about how I want to choose to see my green case full of all my vitamins and supplements as a gift, instead of viewing it as a daily burden.
The week before I made a choice to let go of someone in my life whom I care about a lot, but is no longer contributing positive energy to my life experience.
Yesterday I made the choice to no longer engage in negativity directed at the past (like bitching about ex relationships).
Today I make the choice to no longer require validation of existence. I almost posted that on Facebook for all my friends to see, but then I realized that Facebook itself is kind of like this giant social experiment in validating our individual existences.
And then I chose to write a blog post instead, because I like writing blog posts and I don’t really care if anyone reads them or not, I just like expressing myself. I know that after I hit the publish button, I’m going to share a link to this post on Facebook, just in case anyone feels like reading it, because maybe they like reading other people’s self-expressions. It’s an interesting exercise in considering what I really want out of my own expression of life. I’m having my own experience, I know it, because here I am experiencing it, so what does it matter if anyone else validates that experience? At the same time, sharing that experience is what connecting with others is all about, but there’s a line between sharing your experience with the world, and waiting for others to validate your existence by liking the post you made about nothing in particular.
So, I also choose to knock off the silly facebook posts about thing like the tea I drank last night, posts that serve no deeper purpose than to solicit surface interactions with my friends in order to validate that I still exist and am part of the community. I choose to use social media for actively connecting socially. And I choose to take all the time I could spend on scrolling around for validation of existence and spend it on being as effervescent and expressive as I know how to be.